The Spoils by the numbers

5 bags, 4 shops, 3 stops, 2 friends, 1 lunch.


2 bags of dog treats and toys.

1 bag with 1 birthday present and 3 t shirts.

1 fruitless trip to a Verizon representative.

1 fruitful trip to a Verizon store for a return.

4 pairs of shoes after an 8 month shoe embargo.

1 lipgloss exchanged for 1 wrong shade.

1 nail color + 1 for half price nail color and 2 hair products isn't she born with it?.

4 hours of escape.

Sleeping dogs by the numbers

I have two dogs.

1 oversized golden retriever style dog
+ 1 normal sized golden retriever style dog
= 2 yellow fur factories, 4 floppy ears to clean and 8 enormous paws to wipe.


There are 3 dog beds in my house. The 2 golden retriever style dogs count my 1 bed as theirs, so, in their minds, there are 4 dog beds. But the oversized golden retriever style dog also counts the bath mat as a bed. So. 5 dog beds.


In this picture 1 normal sized golden retriever style dog is sleeping on the floor between 1 dog bed and 1 armoire (which is the fancy 80s word for tv cabinet).

Why?